"..You Really Could Just Be White.."

About two weeks ago I made a trip to the Gilbert Temple to do some sealings. I was acting as a son being sealed to his parents for some of the ancestors I had found while doing family history. It was a wonderful and peaceful experience. I very much enjoy temple sealings because they are the one ordinance in the temple where the person performing the ordinance will take a break and share some wisdom with the patrons who are participating. It's an intimate experience which invites genuine conversation and instruction. This day was no different. It was a good time and I left the temple knowing that I participated in the Lord's work of Salvation. I did have quite an interesting experience though, which has been on my mind since then. The sealer was telling us a story from 1948 (that should date him quite a bit), and during the story he mentioned a certain family who had a "negro butler." That caught my attention, and I had to wonder that if my skin had been a few shades darker whether or not he even would have mentioned that story. It really wasn't that big a deal though because of course Negro in and of itself is not a derogatory term and it's simply how people back then referred to black people. I knew he didn't mean anything by it, and I had no reason at all to be offended.  Although It did surprise me a little to hear such archaic language still being used in 2017.
Like I said, however, I left the temple feeling great. I went straight from the temple to see a movie with my Dad, who is black. After the movie we talked for a long time, but the topic of race never even crossed our minds as far as I can remember. It really wasn't that big a deal.

Then, the following weekend, my Dad was in the hospital recovering from a surgery and I drove up from Tucson to see him. My grandpa Reggie was there, who I hadn't seen in at least five years! I got to sit and visit with him for awhile, and he even gave
me some family history tips on his side of the family. I ended up finding a facebook page that connected me to pretty much all of his side of the family and it was SO COOL! It also helped me realize how black I truly am, even if I don't look like it, and that it was something that I needed to be proud of. I always have been proud to be black, but it's always just been more of a cool little novelty or a fun game of "guess my ethnicity" on a first date. It's never really been something I've actually felt personally connected to because, well, I look pretty white. Hispanic at best, but definitely not Black. In fact, 99.9% of the time people do not believe me when I tell them I'm half black and I have to prove it to them with pictures, family trees, official documents, etc. The truth is, I've never experienced any type of racism or hate for being black, so I can't truly empathize with my black friends and family. Making those family connections really made a difference for me that day, and the events that took place in Charlottesville the next day only reinforced those feelings.

Those events, the reaction (or lack thereof)  of our President, and the subsequent responses by my Church (which I am very proud of) have flooded my mind with thoughts and feelings that I have yet to find the words to express. I want to speak directly to my white Mormon friends, but if anyone else can benefit then that's great. Consider these words from a black family member:

"Hi.... grateful for sharing this story, I was mistreated so badly by the mormons in Mesa and even when I came for your going away celebration at your church, never said anything because you were still doing something great with your life, and I've always prayed for The Holy Spirit to teach, guide and direct you. "


Let's think about the fact that these things happen. Now listen to my Dad. Here is something he sent me:

"Recently my son asked if I would be willing to share the story of my personal experience as a black man being approached to become a member of the Mormon church.  Specifically he wanted me to speak to how I reconciled subtle and glaring racist principles that were once inherent within the church.  

My brother and I were raised  by my very young mother and my grandmother.  My grandmother was a reverend and needless to say, we had a strong deep religious upbringing.  We attended vacation bible school every summer.  and for 2 weeks out of each summer we would attend church camp.  While our friends played and did the things kids do my brother and I attended Church camp; which consisted of no tv, radio, or play.  We attended Church service, for 2 to 3 hours per service, 2 to 3 times per day. This provided us both with a very strong religious background as well as a very thorough knowledge of scripture. 

Years later my grandmother became ill and came to live with my brother and my mother.  About 6 months after graduating from high school, my brother and I came home one day and our grandmother was sitting with two missionaries as they were about to leave.  I don't remember exactly what she said, but she made it clear that she wanted us to set up a time to speak to the nice young men.  Now I fully understood what these two men wanted to speak about.  

Many of my friends were mormon and had schooled us on many of the workings and principles of the church including the past doctrine preventing black men from holding the higher priesthood.  Even though this principle had been overturned in 1978 through revelation, it was still the one overriding block that kept me from previously entertaining any lessons from lds missionaries.  However, out of love and respect fro our grandmother, I agreed to have them come back to provide lessons.  

Besides, as far as I was concerned, there was no way they were going to be able to get beyond what considered the church's racist past and get me to convert.  I was young, smart, well verseed in scripture, I loved to argue, and I loved engaging in scripture battle.  

I was locked, loaded, and ready to shoot down this non-sense of what I considered racism with the nerve to be backed by scripture.  Not biblical scripture.  Mormon scripture.  

So by the time they knocked on the door I was pretty amped. I half expected a full blown argument with me yelling back and forth at the missionaries and kicking them out of our house.

So after inviting them in and exchanging pleasantries it was time to get down to business.  And I was ready.  Now the first order of business was to pray.  Which made sense but I hadn't considered because I was just ready to send some heads rolling. 

 So the elder asked me to pray for the spirit to be with us and to have faith that God would provide answers I needed.  He further said that even though they were conducting lessons, neither he nor his partners would have any of the answers I wanted or be able to tell me if what I was hearing was the truth.  "What?" I thought.  "what do you mean, you can't confirm answers?" I further concluded  "Well this will be fast.  I know my scripture and I've been talking to God all my life...so you don't have a chance here." So I did as he asked, and prayed for God to allow his spirit to be with us during the lessons, and I did genuinely ask him to speak the truth to me.  

Soon enough we were into the lessons- and while there was a lot discussed I'm going to keep this abbreviated. They discussed the book of Mormon and I countered with Biblical scriptures.  And while it was a highly energized conversation, it was in no way argumentative. And My posture was no longer combative.  I found myself becoming highly inquisitive and curious.  Now occasionally a "this is how they getchu" thought would pop in my head and jar me back to my mission of proving them wrong and exposing the inherent church racism.  But  then I noticed something different happening.  First, it was an extremely peaceful and productive conversation.  What's more, is every time I went to counter or scripture check, I would get this intense clarity of thought, and answers were being revealed even before I could locate the scripture.  

And by the time I got to what I thought was the smoking gun of the church's inherent racism as to why blacks were unable to hold the higher priesthood until 1978, that answer was being revealed in such a clear way it could not be ignored.  And even though the elder was speaking his words, all I could hear was the Spirit of God whispering the truth of things to me.  It was a nonlinear answer that was so clear, thorough, and complete that I knew it to be the truth.  

The reality is that we are not in a perfect world.  And while God's word and mission are perfect, it must be established through the imperfect perspectives of humankind.  Man has comitted horrible atrocities all throughout history including war, slavery, and the killing of our Lord Jesus Christ.  However, god's word and mission was being established through all of it.  But to look at these things through our own eyes, only breeds anger and contempt.  At the end of the day, the most important thing the elder did for me was to ask me, in my own words to pray for God and his spirit to be with me.  this is the same thing my grand mother and my mother had instructed me to do for years.  To to pray for guidance.  Because there is no way, that my human mind would have been able to look beyond what I considered to be extremely offensive and accept something that would have enormous eternal benefits.  

Nevertheless, let's not kid ourselves.  There are several scriptures in the Book of Mormon that can be referenced as blatantly racist. The scriptures can and have been used by white members as a license to practice their own version of racial superiority. But in my experience, these have been the exception and not the norm.  

The afore-mentioned mormon friends I grew up with never expressed or displayed even so much as an ounce racial or spiritual superiority. Occasionally, we would hear of someone's elder relative expressing racist views.  But this was common across the board in any religion.  And I am in no way naive enough to believe that racism didn't exist beyond the spectrum of my friends and experience.  The point is, that the mormon friends I grew up with never did.  And that experience had extraordinarily positive influence on my pre-convert perspective of the church.  They were just great people.  And while they never personally attempted to convert us, their friendship had a tremendous impact on my decision to join.  Of course there are individuals that continue to misuse past scripture and doctrine as a justification for racism.  But I can assure you that it is not of the spirit of God. there is no way, any person can genuinely pray in his heart for truth from the Spirit of God, and still harbor racist thoughts, perspectives, or ideology.  (Left, Dad and Twin Brother in High School)

The bottom line is that Each of us has a personal responsibility to earnestly pray for wisdom, guidance, and clarity from the spirit of God on all matters including racism. As members of the human race we can not know all things.  And relying on our own intelligence which is heavily influenced by our own fears, past, experiences, and familial upbringing is not likely to produce answers that are most beneficial to our own well being.

I can't speak for all black or non-white members of the church.  But as for me my decision to join had nothing to do with reconciling disagreeable principles of the past.  My decision was, as it should be with all investigators;  My decision was between me and God.    

I'll end with a biblical scripture that has assisted me more time than I can count.   

Proverbs 3:5-6 says Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. 6In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.… 

Marv Wilson"

Isn't that such a cool story? I'm sure countless black members could share similar stories. What I took from it the most was that the Spirit is what helped him through this. God has power to do all things, and that certainly includes helping people overcome their doubts and fears about the gospel. Only the Spirit could heal any past wounds, and the missionaries were only there to show my Dad love and support as he sought his own answers. I think those same principles from the Spirit and showing love and support  can apply on a church-wide or even a worldwide level if we will allow them to.

I am not posting this for anyone who is openly racist or supports white supremacy. If that is you, I invite you to repent and consider your ways. God made us all equal.

No, I'm not talking to any extreme group. I'm talking to normal, good people. I want you to know that there is a real problem with racism in the world, even if it isn't as clearly visible as it once was. Please stop trying to explain it away or trying to prove that there isn't racism. If your black friend complains to you about racism, the last thing they need to hear is that there actually isn't and they definitely don't care to hear about how not racist you are. Listen to your friends. Try to understand where they are coming from instead of assuming their motives or possible political agendas.

Stop trying to explain away or give reasons for the priesthood ban. Trust me, most black LDS people have put a lot of thought into that subject already. They've probably put a lot more thought into to it than you have to be honest. They've probably spent more than one night lying awake wondering how they would be able to look past something so offensive to them. I won't give this as an official answer, but I will say that it's okay to  accept the fact that the Priesthood Ban was probably just a mistake. I believe God had his hand in allowing that mistake to happen and subsequently helping us fix it, but in reality it doesn't matter. Facts aren't what helped my dad overcome this, it was the Holy Ghost. It has been almost forty years now, and it is time to move on from what happened. We do not need to be apologists for the past, we simply need to love those who are here with us in the present. The Spirit will work upon people as they humble themselves and come unto Christ, and we should allow God to do his own work. We don't have to have an answer for everything, we just need to be there for those who need us. If you are curious, I've attached some links for further study.

Because the truth is there is racism within the Church. Just google "Wife With a Purpose" if you don't believe me. There is plenty of racism in this country. Just turn on your TV. We need more White people actively opposing racism and standing up with those who are being targeted. The time is gone when we could just sit quietly and ignore what happens around us. We live in a time when silence will do just as much damage as blatant racism will. Evil is knocking right on our doorstep, so what are we going to do?

Last week my grandmother messaged me about an article I posted on Facebook. She said something that has stuck in my mind all week:

"Thank you for standing, especially [you] grandson because you really could just be ... white."

(My grandma with Muhammad Ali. Just thought it was cool)

It hadn't occurred to me before that I had to choose to be black. If I really wanted to I could just sit back and ignore things because I honestly probably enjoy just as much white privilege as anyone else. We have that same choice to make.

I want to invite all of you to talk to your closest black friend or acquaintance. Talk to them about what's happening and then look at the pain in their eyes. Try to feel how real this is for them. They don't have the luxury of saying "well I'm not racist, so this doesn't apply to me." They don't have the luxury of parading around their black half when it's cool and then dishing out the white side when it seems advantageous. We're all in this together, and many of our brothers and sisters are experiencing so much pain, no matter what you may believe the cause of that pain may be. It's real for them, so it's real for us. It's time to "comfort those who stand in need of comfort."

Please, take a stand. You never know who you might help.

34 Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:

35 For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:

36 Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visitedme: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.

37 Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?

38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?

39 Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me. (Matthew 25:34-40)

For additional questions on Blacks and the priesthood, here are some links:

https://www.lds.org/topics/race-and-the-priesthood?lang=eng

https://speeches-beta.byu.edu/talks/bruce-r-mcconkie_alike-unto-god-2/

\

"O Jesus, Thou Son of God..."

The prophet Alma from the Book of Mormon had quite an incredible conversion to the gospel, and these are the words he used to share his story years later:

16 And now, for three days and for three nights was I racked, even with the pains of a damned soul.

17 And it came to pass that as I was thus racked with torment, while I was harrowed up by the memory of my many sins, behold, I remembered also to have heard my father prophesy unto the people concerning the coming of one Jesus Christ, a Son of God, to atone for the sins of the world.

18 Now, as my mind caught hold upon this thought, I cried within my heart: O Jesus, thou Son of God, have mercy on me, who am in the gall of bitterness, and am encircled about by the everlasting chains of death.

19 And now, behold, when I thought this, I could remember my pains no more; yea, I was harrowed up by the memory of my sins no more.

20 And oh, what joy, and what marvelous light I did behold; yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain!

This is a deeply personal and descriptive account of what it feels like to experience the redeeming love of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Earlier in this chapter Alma stated  "Now, behold, I say unto you, if I had not been born of God I should not have known these things; but God has, by the mouth of his holy angel, made these things known unto me, not of any worthiness of myself." Alma did not have to earn the savior's love. It was already there, just as it is for any of us. All we have to do is reach out to him.

Sometimes I get caught up in defending my beliefs or trying to clear up misconceptions about the doctrine/history of the Restored Church. While those things are important and I hope more than anything people can at least benefit a little from the words I share, the focal point of my faith is not in any specific doctrine or historical finding. It is in Jesus Christ.

The Prophet Joseph Smith taught:

"The fundamental principles of our religion are the testimony of the Apostles and Prophets, concerning Jesus Christ, that He died, was buried, and rose again the third day, and ascended into heaven; and all other things which pertain to our religion are only appendages to it" 

He is the Great Jehova. He is both the Father and the Son. He's the savior, redeemer, and the Prince of Peace. He is an High Priest of good things to come. He is the Messiah, the Creator, and the great I AM. He is the firstfruits of those who slept. He is Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. He is Endless. He is Eternal. He is the Son of God, come in the flesh.

Jesus Christ and the infinite power which He offers us through His atonement are the best way for us to overcome the struggles we are facing now as individuals and as a nation. Christlike faith, hope, and charity will change the world faster than anything else we can come up with. I truly believe that.

I would invite all of us to have greater faith in Him. In doing so I would remind you that Faith is not a perfect knowledge of things, but rather it is to "hope for things which are not seen, which are true."  Another Book of Mormon prophet, Moroni, taught us that faith must precede the miracle. That's completely backwards from any scientific method we are taught in school, but that is the way God works. Faith first, evidence second.

Jesus Christ suffered all manner of hardships and temptations so that he would know exactly how to help us in our times of need. (See Hebrews 3:16-18, Alma 7:11-14) If we come to him with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, he will heal us. Not only will he heal us but he will lift us to heights we never thought possible as he carries us with "healing in his wings."

Life is hard. Looking back on our lives, we all find times of trial where we could have echoed the words of Alma, finding ourselves in the "gall of bitterness." May we all have compassion for one another and try to put ourselves in each other's shoes before we jump to judging them. May we try to see people as Christ sees them.

As we come to Him in humility and unity, Christ will heal us. He will transform us and make us the best versions of ourselves. Whether we are white, black, brown, gay, straight, , male, female, He will help us.

All of us.